for Amy

just over 24 hours ago, i was viciously fighting back the throes of sleep, willing myself to stay awake just one hour longer, checking my phone constantly to check how much time had elapsed and to ensure that i hadn't missed midnight.

why, you ask?

well, today was this one's 21st birthday.

...aaaand she is the most special chicken, whom i love ardently and cannot do without. naturally, then, i had to wish her a happy birthday as the day dawned!

it's as though my body was against me on this one - usually i'm up far later than midnight, but for some reason, last night i just couldn't keep my eyes open, resolving to compromise and doze off into a fitful bout of sleep with the lights on. thankfully, by sticking to this method, i managed to wake up just before midnight and got the message off in time. YES!

by this stage, you're probably thinking i'm a little psycho and stalkerish, which is probably fair, but i think if you have met and gotten to know Amy-Jane, you'll understand my friendly obsession ;)

for one thing, Amy and i have conversations that mainly consist of emojis. observe exhibits A-D below:


EXHIBIT A:



EXHIBIT B:



EXHIBIT C:



EXHIBIT D:


this is clearly the best way to build a solid friendship. we can communicate, nay, express deep and heartfelt emotion, in IMAGES.

there are other, more serious reasons why Amy is home and away one of the best people i know, however. for one thing, she talks AND she listens. these kinds of people are hard to find. Amy's and my friendship was forged in the fire that is the AMM's design computer lab, where we found ourselves seated alongside one another for maaaany hours. (more on that in a minute.) to survive in that soul-devouring place, you really need one another. i can't begin to describe the horror of spending hour upon hour alone in there (an experience which i lived several times and don't really wish on anyone at all). it's so necessary just to have a fat chat with whoever is around, spread some ridiculousness, talk about the most obscure and personal stuff and occasionally try to learn the dance moves in Meghan Trainor's "All About That Bass" music video or watch heartbreakingly cute animal clips. Amy is the best for this. if i were a worse friend, i'd hire her out by the hour as an advice-giver, or just a reassure-r. (i don't think that's a word. aaaanyway.) i shan't do this! i am a pretty good friend, but i can't hold a candle to Ames.

another thing i love about this girl is her passion and her discipline. she works. and by 'works', i mean she WORKS. i have not seen anything done by Amy that she hasn't poured her whole being into. that's a tough ask in design class, where you're bound to come across a project or two that just don't resonate with you. that's also difficult to do when working for a student newspaper, where the layout is often repetitive and difficult to adjust, and it's a lot simpler to stick with the most basic format, even if it doesn't look as great as it could. Amy won't stand for that, and i love her for it. she is meticulous and passionate and sticks to her guns. she's a fiery redhead and it's the greatest thing.

this leads on to another of Amy's many many virtues. as passionate as she is about her work, she is that much more passionate about the people that she loves. i have witnessed Amy fight for friendships, and it is something beautiful and rare in this world. she cares a lot more than many people i know our age, who have reached a point of ambivalence or indifference in relationships that is quite discouraging. instead of taking this approach, Ames will explore every angle of a situation and fight ferociously for what she feels is right, without demeaning or attacking whoever or whatever's in the other corner with hatred or disregard. when something has happened that has upset her, she refuses to attack the person who has caused the upset; she approaches them to talk it all over. she sends comprehensive messages of THIS length to resolve problematic situations. 2 and a half screens worth of willingness to meet halfway.





can you imagine this? she is an absolutely magical unicorn of a person.

there are so many other things i love about Amy. she has the most beautiful smile. she and her boyfriend Quentin have been dating for 5 years now and they are precious - not in a demeaning sense, but in the sense that what they have is something rare and incredibly valuable. she shares her chocolate with me. (this is clearly the best thing.) she keeps me sane and reassures me that everything is going to be alright, and even if it isn't, that she will be there. when you have someone like that fighting in your corner, don't they deserve a message at midnight? don't they deserve a blog post? they deserve a lot more, in fact. cake's on me when you get back here, Amesaroonie ;)

so: there you have it. my attempt to sum up the awesomeness that is the beautiful Amy-Jane, and to make you all jealous if she is not your friend. for the final time tonight, my sweet and ever-steady friend, i will take the opportunity to announce:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

i love you more than songs or blog posts or words (or even emojis) could say.

twenty-two lessons

the day is upon us! it has finally arrived! it is the moment we have all been waiting for! my birthday!

ha ;)

now that i have reached the ripe old age of twenty-two (cue a chorus of Taylor Swift and co. crooning, "twenty-twooo-oo-oo-oooh!") i am feeling super mature and knowledgeable, and i have clearly figured everything out. not. i have, however, figured out that the whole "write a list of [insert age here] things to do at [insert age here]!" shebang just doesn't work for me. (i have tried on several birthdays to set such goals. there is blog evidence of my attempts. don't look for them! it is pitiful. there are still things on my list from, like, 18 which i haven't achieved yet.) 

instead, i decided that this year i'd write a list of 22 things i have learned and in which i believe - little lessons that friends or family or writers or movies or Instagram (awkward) have taught me, and stuff to remind myself over the course of 2015. this list will go up in my office, and it will go up in my bedroom (although, to be fair, my office is probably going to be my bedroom on many occasions), and it will remind me of good things and hard work and being useful. i'm sharing it here because i am a generous soul and i like to impart wisdom on other people. (i also like sarcasm way more than anyone should, so if i'm coming off as desperately sanctimonious, you should know that i'm laughing at myself as i sit here and type this ;) )

so! without further ado, i reveal The List (with some explanations below the photo):

...and now for the explanations.

1. claim your space.

i put this first because it is something i have decided i am going to live out in the coming year if it kills me. too often i have let myself be confined to other people's expectations; too many times i have tried to take up as little physical, mental and emotional space as possible to make room for everyone else. this has to stop, because i am valuable and so are my opinions and feelings and activities. my amazingamazing boyfriend Chris got me a copy of Amy Poehler's book Yes Please for Christmas/my birthday, and she has so much to say about the value of owning your space and not letting others take it from you. to quote her, "Am I allowed to take up space? Yes please." i will be taking up space this year. you should, too.

2. popular doesn't equal valuable.

i received this piece of advice from the crazy Dallas Clayton (a modern day Dr Seuss) who posted this on his Instagram account this morning:

"It's nice to be popular. It's a good feeling - to belong, to have a voice that is heard, agreed with, supported. It's nice to know people care about you, think about you. Could be your classmates at school, peers at work, maybe even strangers on the street. It's tricky though, when we begin to put popularity first, to consider it synonymous with worth. We raise children to believe that life is not a popularity contest, and yet here on all sides of us we find ranking, calculating, listing from best to worst. Doesn't show any signs of slowing down, near as I can tell. Popularity contests are in fact as popular as they've ever been. Ha! So how do we reckon with it? I suspect the answer has something to do with embracing that thing you love, knowing that who you are and what you are doesn't have to be popular to matter. Celebrating, in the face of all this projected desire to sit in the number one spot, the idea that the small and simple things can have just as much impact as those designed to blanket the masses. Play your song, raise your banner, love your love, find your worth, and be yourself, no matter who's listening."

great advice, right?

3. hard work beats talent 99.5% of the time.

i wrote a whole blog post on this a few days ago, so i won't bore you with the details again. go read it here if you haven't already ;) (funny story - when typing this list out on my typewriter, i'd planned on typing "hard work beats talent 99% of the time" for this point. i hit shift when i shouldn't have and got a half sign instead of a percentage sign... as if to really reinforce how small your chances of getting by on sheer talent are. not even 1%. half a percent. well played, silly fingers.)

4. imperfection can be beautiful.

another blog post for you to read! 

5. treat yo'self.

a lesson i learned from the marvellous Donna Meagle and Tom Haverford (characters on the best television show on earth, Parks and Recreation). breaks are good. rest is lovely. treats are the SHIZ. taking care of yourself is important. this seems obvious, but i'm very talented at skipping the rest and the care, so i have to remind myself.

6. put your phone down.

ugh. i need a detox. i am addicted and it is not good! there is so much more to do than sit around and play games or check Facebook and Instagram five kajillion times an hour. i plan on doing some of that much more, because life is short and faces are far nicer than screens.

7. there is not enough time for hating yourself. too much to make. go.

this gem of advice comes from the iridescent Tavi Gevinson. self-hate - who needs it? your time could be much better spent. my time could, too.

8. step out. don't settle for what's comfortable. pursue things that frighten you.

introversion means i don't like introducing myself to people. or doing lots of social activities. eep. it's time to conquer this, even just a little bit.

9. discipline is remembering what you want.

constant vigilance! 

10. grammar is important.

i am of the opinion that this needs no explanation. (grammar does not include using capital letters at the beginnings of sentences on social media platforms, by the way. in case you were wondering.)

11. time moves quickly. use it while you have it. love people while they are still with you.

it feels like yesterday i was an ickle firstie, sitting in one of the AMM's seminar rooms for a Journ 1 tut. now i will be sharing an office with somebody as i intern and work towards my Masters. time is crazy and moves at a ridiculous pace. i want to make good use of the time i have. procrastination only gives you (metaphorical, but sometimes literal) ulcers.

as for loving people? i have taken for granted the presence of many of my friends over the past few years. this is something i am realising now that it's too late, and they are no longer going to be around me as much. i don't want to make the same mistake again.

12. travel is always a good idea.

duh.

13. get the right amount of sleep.

you'd think this would be a given. i am bad at sleeping ENOUGH - i either sleep too little or far too much. striking a balance would be fabulous.

14. write more, read more, listen more, hug more.

all perfectly good goals. i was going to add "swear less"... but naaaaah. life's too short ;)

15. weirdness is underrated.

i have already embraced my crazy. i am just letting you know that nothing is going to happen to change that this year. prepare yourself accordingly.

16. believe in magic.

not necessarily the wave-your-wand Harry Potter kind or the wriggle-your-nose Matilda kind (although who am i to stop you if you want to believe in that?) - i'm talking more about the everyday kind of magic. when something you need to happen just happens. or someone you love phones right when you need to hear their voice. or you eat a magical slice of cake. magic exists! believe!

17. laughter is helium and healing.

it is lightness and can be a marvellous thief of both petty sadness and heavy sorrow. also, the sound of it is wonderful! most of the time. some people have terrible laughs and should just never ever laugh in the presence of other people. (just kidding... but not really.)

18. honesty is more important than visibility.

to quote Mr Clayton again, "Focus more on how much you have done, how honest it is and how it moves you forward. Focus less on how many people have seen it."

19. friendships should be measured not by volume but by depth.

the good old "quality over quantity" argument works here. i am so grateful for the relatively few but extraordinarily precious people i count as close friends.

20. there's nothing wrong with being the one who loves the most, but you have to love yourself, too.

this! this is from a longer piece written by a young woman named Emm Roy, who does marvellous work over at Emm's Positivity Blog. i love it, and i am working hard at loving myself.

21. you are not who you were. nor are you done changing. live in the layers, not on the litter.

this point was inspired by a poem i read yesterday called "The Layers" by Stanley Kunitz which my friend Sarah shared on Facebook and which i'm pretty sure is going to be my poem for 2015. just go read it.

22. kill it. every time.

here, "it" refers to all the work i have ahead of me this year - the work about which i'm anxious and excited and terrified. it also refers to any and every mosquito. i hate mosquitoes.

...and there you have it! a very lengthy list of things i will be telling myself this year. 

nothing inspired by Taylor Swift. 

weird.

on owning a typewriter

as of 25 and a half hours ago, i possess a Royal 240 typewriter. she is beautiful, old-school but not too old, and fully functional, and if owning her makes me a hipster, i don't really care.

i bought the sweet piece of machinery online all the way back in June, but was only able to arrange to pick it up from my sweet friend Hannah (who runs the online store The Union, where she featured it) yesterday. as a side note, we should make paying for things which we only receive much later a more common occurrence. instant gratification is overrated. it is so lovely to receive a thing for which you paid when you had money, at a time when you don't have as much money! it is like a gift from my past self to my present self. thanks, past self! you are the business. moving on.

since getting home and having my mom teach me how to use the machine (she faced a combination of questions on my part which ranged from "what does this button do?" to "what's the lever for?" to "remind me again how to..." to "huh?"), i've spent a solid amount of time tick-tacking away on it, typing out all of my favourite poems. (note: tomorrow is my birthday. if you would like to buy me a present but you don't know what to get me, a ream of paper would be lovely.) good golly, it's so much fun! while typing yesterday and today, however, i came to a few conclusions, so you may find below my list of pros and cons regarding using a typewriter. (with annotations ;) )

1. (she writes on her online blog.)
2. ...or tell the time. or take a selfie. i am clearly addicted to the internet and to multifunctionality of recent technology. (this is more a poor reflection on me than on the typewriter... hmmm.)
3. because of this, you will want to type out old-timey poetry and long quotes from books that you love, and you will suddenly feel inspired to write long letters to all the people you love the best.
4. i tell myself that this counts as weightlifting, though, so it's not all bad.
5. this is what i tell myself, anyway, after making at least one error in pretty much everything i've typed so far.
6. they are inescapable. you will have to do some crossing out, or retype the entire page. prepare yourself.
7. it does not need to be plugged in! huzzah!
8. but seriously, this happens a lot less frequently than my laptop's battery dies.
9. ha. suck it, Word!
10. this means typing late at night while everyone is asleep is a bad idea (unless your intention is to wake everyone in the immediate vicinity, in which case, go right on ahead).

all in all, i have fallen in love and am super happy with my purchase. here is a shot of my typewriter from above, as well as a lovely long quote i typed out by one of my favourite authors, Anne Lamott:

how great is that? as much as i love motivation and working hard (see my last post for more on this, ha), it's also so important to love who and what and where we are now - and to have the courage to change these things if we don't love them. living in fear or anxiety is just so time-consuming. i love my typewriter for giving me clear examples of how imperfection can be beautiful and acceptable and not the end of the world ;)

hard work

i promised y'all i'd write again today, so here we are :) this one's gonna be fairly seriaaas so if you're not in the mood for some introspection, i won't be offended if you don't read through my mind's perambulations ;)

there's something i've sort of always known intellectually but have come to only really grasp in the past year, and particularly in the last few months: if you want something, it's ultimately up to you to go out and get it.

sure, it's not always as cut and dried as that; many people are handed stuff (money, contracts, whatever) in life without having really worked for it, or they're born with particular talents which make it easier for them to succeed in whichever field. i've always had a knack for academics, and didn't really struggle throughout school and university to do well when it came to tests, projects and exams. that's not to say i didn't work hard; i put a lot of effort into the work i produced and i'm proud of what i've achieved. that being said, it all came fairly naturally to me.

not so with other areas of my life - particularly in the athletic arena. i was an active kid, sure, and i climbed a lot of trees and played a lot of stingers growing up… but i never really enjoyed PE or any of the sports in which i was required to take part. i was always the last kid running around the Oval, panting and puffing on the warm up lap, my face red and my legs tired. i didn't learn how to skip rope; i never felt the need. likewise with riding a bike, something i still can't do. i attempted it on a couple of occasions and then gave up after falling over what i deemed to be one too many times. this didn't really bother me. 

my family isn't big into sports but i've been a sports fan for about a decade now, getting into cricket in 2005 and rugby the following year. this, however, didn't make me any more of an athlete. i've always admired sportspeople but have conceded time and time again that i'm just not like them, not cut out to be fit and strong. then, sometime between 2013 and 2014, i decided that even if i wasn't an athlete, i could do a little more to take care of myself and in so doing, feel better about the body i have. yo, i'm not overweight; nor do i have any major health concerns or complex body issues. however, we could all do a little more to look and/or feel a little better - amiright? 

i started running (and was honestly terrible at it), and then in April last year i started CrossFit. at this point, i had no core muscles to speak of (or they were in deep, deep hibernation). our coach would tell us to "brace our cores" when doing whatever movement and i'd glance around like a dumb nut because, um, i honestly didn't know how to brace what i didn't have. i would scale pretty much every workout. i would take longer to finish the workout than anyone else - sometimes double the length of the really fit, shiny people. i felt a bit like Jabba the Hutt doing CrossFit. 

(all credit here to Nathan Wright... i had to add that sentence in to accommodate the amazing sketch, of course.)

i let this get to me for a little bit, and started getting the feeling that I COULDN'T DO THIS and I SHOULD JUST GIVE UP… because this was my pattern. whenever i encountered something in life that i wasn't able to master within a week, i'd toss it aside. 

as soon as i realised this, it was like a light was suddenly switched on in a really dusty room in my mind. almost as soon as i made this discovery, it actually became easier to push through. i was doing something i'd never done before - carrying on with something at which i was pretty pathetic, with the intention of getting better - and it was terrifying and liberating at the same time. i started rolling my eyes at the shiny, fit people and just doing my thing. (i didn't really roll my eyes at them. i love most of them. i want to be them when i grow up one day.) and honestly, i'm still pretty terrible. i can't do a pull-up unassisted, and the most i can crank out in a row with a band is maybe… seven? i'm also incapable of doing toes-to-bar or hand-stand push ups yet, and most of the weightlifting is really challenging for me. i'm the world's worst Russian get-upper, burpees are still a major nemesis and i've yet to achieve a single double-under. BUT. i can do box jumps forever. i can squat really well. i have learned how to skip (!) and can do so pretty quickly (!). i can deadlift 60kg, which is more than i weigh. and guys. I HAVE SOME CORE MUSCLES! THEY HAVE AWOKEN! more than anything, i have learned to stick it out and push myself to be a better version of me, and i'm getting somewhere at whatever pace. it really is sort of miraculous. 

one of the guys i follow on Instagram, marky_ih, posted this yesterday:

underneath it he wrote, "You can be born with talent but you'll never master your craft without dedicating hours of hard work to develop skills. If you're not dedicating time every day to your craft then you don't want it bad enough."

how true is that?! i'm not crazy; i'm never gonna be Camille Leblanc-Bazinet or Annie Thorisdottir or Julie Foucher, and that's okay. i'm going to be Hannah, and i'm going to be the best version of her that i can be. if that means working on something athletic at which i am pathetic every day, then that's what i'll do. (clearly i do not need to work on my rhyming skills. they are excellent.) the same applies for my designing and hand lettering; the same applies for my blogging. (don't panic, i'm not gonna blog every day and spam you with posts ;) )

in any case, that's my aim. what do you think? that was a lot to suffer through without many pictures, so have a hug:

and have some motivation:

and have a severely disgruntled cat dressed as a taco:

and sleep tight :)

twenty fourteen

a great hullabaloo is made at the beginning of each new year to look ahead, anticipate and plan for the coming months. we're encouraged by numerous community sites (you know, BuzzFeed and Huffington Post and Mashable etc) to let go of what's behind and move forward, grabbing each new opportunity that comes flying towards us. (deep! also, terrifying.) even Dumbledore gave similar wisdom to our favourite Harry Potter when he said, "it doesn't do to dwell in dreams and forget to live." (or something very close to that. i was too lazy to look up the actual quote.)

i recognise the good in this, but in considering what to blog about next, i've decided that i would just like to reflect on the year that's ended one last time before saying "so long". i know, i know - i'm being clingy, which is never good, but 2014 was one of my favourite years to date and so i've established that steeping myself in its memories will make this year even better! ha ;)

JANUARY

The year started off amazingly because we were in California - i got to see the New Year in at my lovely aunt Kymmie's house, with Kym and Andrea and Celia and Zoey and other fine fine specimens of human being. after New Years, we had about a week left in Sacramento and it was mostly spent just BEING with family, which was great. on our last Saturday there, i went to watch Hunger Games: Catching Fire with Andrea and Keaton, and arrived back at my gramma's house to the most gorgeous and unexpected surprise birthday tea (!) with so many of my miraculous family members. it was overwhelming and really beautiful.

flying home made me unbelievably sad but there were three things coming up just on the other side of the flight which made the journey sweet: spending a little bit of time with my brother Huw and sister-in-law Mary-Elyse, two of my favourite people of all time; Judy and Mart's wedding; and then a week with Chris! Huw and ME were housesitting for some friends in this gloriously roomy place, and it was a great space to reorient timezone-wise. (there were two ludicrously large and unruly dogs there, too, but eventually we got the hang of them.) Chris came over for a few hours on one of the days, and it was magical. Sindi and i then caught a lift with two lovely friends-of-friends up to a magnificent place in Limpopo, where we got to witness Judy and Martin tie the knot :D Judy is one of the best people i know and it was such a blessing to be a part of the day. fliiiiip! 

we drove back to Johannesburg the next day with some friends; Sindi was dropped off at the airport and i was dropped off at Chris's house. best. he took me to a tea shop called Contessa and we did tea tasting and i took many photos of his dogs and one sneaky photo of a reflection of us which he caught me taking… hee. <3

i flew home a week later, and the rest of January passed pretty unspectacularly - helping my mom out at her school, mostly. i met some of the most incredible kids, particularly the fantastic Emilio, who taught me numerous phrases in Italian ("ti voglio tanto tanto tanto bene!" being the most popular), and turned 21 on the 21st, on which i did some gardening and ate some cupcakes and read some books :)

FEBRUARY

February was a month of many firsts :) early in February, i returned to Grahamstown, almost single-handedly moved into my own flat and thus started my proper adult life (paying rent for a place, living alone, making food, washing dishes… all the best stuff). i also registered for my final year of my Bachelor of Journalism and Media Studies, began DESIGN 4 with the coolest cats, officially started as The Oppidan Press's Assistant Chief Designer and started tutoring Journ 2s. life as a student in Grahamstown is generally predictable; once you've lived on campus for a year, it's easy to fall back into familiar rhythms. it was a little scary but a lot fun to move off of campus (just) and i can say that had i known what a pleasure digs life can be, i'd have moved out of res a few years earlier than i actually did! one tradition that remained the same (and has since our first year of varsity) was breakfast with my friend Sarah; this year, instead of eating together in the dining hall each morning, we alternated flats (since we lived in the same complex) :) another tradition that was formed early in the year was working into the early hours of the morning with my design girls in our lab. Bronwyn, Lucy, Kiera and Madien were the main culprits and i still miss them and those silly evenings a gargantuan amount <3 midway through February, i went to Port Elizabeth with Darsha to watch the South African cricket team take on Australia; we made Hashim Amla beards and i drank a Steri Stumpie and then we went to Walmer Park and did some shopping :) February was also the month when my class hopped on a bus and drove Cape-Town-ward for the Design Indaba conference, which was a mind-blowing experience. We had the most fun!

MARCH

the Design Indaba ran over into March, so for the first few days of the month we were in Cape Town. I was lucky enough to spend some time with the beautiful Hayley, and on our final day in Cape Town i took a hike up a small range of mountains with her and some of her friends. i love that city and that view and that girl!

on our return to Grahamstown, i adopted a cactus whom i named Eleanor Jean; i gave up sugar for Lent; i bought and read two very fine books (Jane Austen's Persuasion and John Green's An Abundance of Katherines), Darsha, Natalie, Prinnesca and i went to the beach for Human Rights Day; Chris turned 23 and my class began designing the programme for the National Arts Festival.

APRIL

April started off fantastically - since i decided not to go home for my week of holiday, my mama arrived for a visit in the last week of term! i faked a haircut for April Fools, which everyone and their dog fell for. (i still haven't cut my hair! eep.) i also started CrossFit and refused to ever look back ;) Chris and i puppy-sat little Themba (who is now enormous, naturally).

Chris's graduation weekend was awesome - his ceremony, him looking all dapper in his suit, his ceremony, sharing horrified glances with his mom as girls in what appeared to be 12-inch heels waltzed across the stage, dinner at Gino's… the whole shebang. 

grad also meant sneakily attending the garden party and there i got to see my Keegan - cue all the grinning!

i was still super involved with Oppi and i was so proud of our team (particularly Nats and Marc) for pulling off an incredible election debate on the last day of the month.

MAY

in May, i voted in my first national election, an experience about which i had such mixed feelings. i was overwhelmed to be informed that my design had been chosen for the cover of the National Arts Festival programme! my class took a trip to Port Elizabeth to learn more about the printing process, and while we were at the printers they were busy assembling copies of the programme… with thousands of my design scattered across the room. it was craziness. i also started drinking coffee in May, and we did more puppy-sitting, so May was a superb month ;)

JUNE

June was slightly average because it was the month of our final exam ever, for which i have only one word - uuuugh. Good things happened, though - my design for some banner signage was also chosen for the Festival! i had a cake day with my Natalie! i got to roadtrip back to KZN with two of my dear friends, Kiera and Madien, and we had the biggest veg session ever once we got to Kiera's house! We started watching Orange Is The New Black and didn't stop for at least six hours. it was magical! my family fetched me on Sunday and i spent a lovely, quiet week at home (mostly chillin' with my cats, and extending the strings on helium balloons for Paolo, Emilio and Luigi till they were running around with balloons crazy far up in the sky) before i was driven back to Umhlanga, where i bought a new cell phone (!) and then met back up with Mads and Kiera (and watched Silver Linings Playbook, because duh). eeeeearly the next morning, Mads, Kiera, Kiera's brother Brendan and i began the trip back to Grahamstown - a trip personified by Watsky's song Sloppy Seconds :)

JULY

July was Arts Festival month, and as such most of the start of it revolved around designing Cue, the daily Arts Festival newspaper. it was a pretty fantastic time based on the company (my favourite kids, minus one Amy Harkess!) Natty and i had a Mexican 4th of July, my mom and sister drove through, we went to tons of shows during the day, most nights i worked 6, often 7-hour shifts into the wee hours of the morning, i drank soooo much coffee (there was a Nespresso machine in the Journ department!) and i decided i'd sign on to being a Masters kid and interning under my lecturer in 2015. LOTS OF BIG STUFF HAPPENED. And then, before it felt like i could catch my breath again, term 3 started.

AUGUST

the first day of August was brilliant and crazy and perfect. it was my and Chris's third anniversary, and we had all of the Wimpy breakfast to celebrate. then, to cap off the already wonderful day, i got fetched from the Journ department by my favourite, one ALISON HOOKINS! all the way from Russia back to me! we ate cake and talked and she gave me a beautiful Gatsby shirt and flamingo earrings and panda pins and i couldn't deal. obviously. i got to hang out with her some for the rest of that weekend, which was jolly wonderful. then she left and i was moer sad, as one is when one has to say goodbye to one of the best friends one has ever known. (come back to meeeee, Ali Grace!)

at the beginning of August i signed up to take part in CrossFit Grahamstown's eight-week challenge, and got some sweet kicks, and learned how to skip, and got a speed rope! i visited a letterpress, made my own poster out of letterpress and completely buggered up the final product (but fixed it for my portfolio, thankfully). i housesat for my lecturer, improved my one-rep max deadlift from 25kg to 60kg, struggled through another of Grahamstown's water crises, and attended a cultural show with Darsha. also, i ate a Magnum which Chris bought me. (that is love!) and my phone was stolen. i was under the impression that August hadn't been such a crazy month, but in retrospect… 

SEPTEMBER

i got to go home again in early September! once there, i got a Grumpy Cat mug, attended our annual local art exhibition, finally met Lady Grey the cat, painted some funky pottery, got to drink coffee and eat pancakes and bagels at a beautiful new cafe in town called Tally's Corner Cafe with Sindi and Alan, hung out at my mom's school and got to say the worst goodbye to Paolo, Emilio and Luigi. then, before i could blink i was back in Grahamstown; i started learning coding as a part of my web design intensive; spring sprung; i very suddenly applied for and was appointed Chief Designer for The Oppidan Press for the end of 2014 into 2015, with my sweet Amy-Jane being appointed Assistant Chief; i spontaneously celebrated National Coffee Day with Bronwyn at Homeground and we had our own spin on "Rocking the Daisies" ;)

OCTOBER

October marked Amy-Jane's and my first edition as Assistant Chief and Chief Designer of Oppi respectively, during which i discovered that it was a hair-raising process and i love her dearly! my darlin' Sindi-sister visited Grahamstown,  i had a mole removed, the society of which i was chairperson - Inkwenkwezi - was awarded Community Engagement Society of the Year, and i drowned in piles and piles of work which i had put off from earlier in the year. (don't do this to yourselves, people!) in the midst of all the crazy, i came home to Chris one Saturday after a ridiculous paste-up session at Oppi and he handed me a beautiful bunch of coral-coloured snapdragons. that is probably the highlight of my year right there. my Giants won the World Series (!); Chris started getting back into athletics and he ran at an athletics meet in Port Elizabeth, where he did really well. (afterwards we had McDonalds, because MCDONALDS!) i also had a marvellous time at a party my dear friend Cathy held; one of the reasons i'm looking forward to this year is more time spent with her, something i am going to make a concerted effort to arrange.

NOVEMBER

crazy month! November marked the end of our web design course, which meant hours upon hours of us in the labs, trying to design portfolio websites for ourselves (and asking Josh to help us with everything). my incredible aunt Celia, along with Andrea and Kristen, went to see Relient K perform in Sacramento - and Celia skyped me in on the show, for over twenty minutes! it was the most phenomenal thing and i felt so blessed to be included in that way. November was also the month of some crazy weather, including a ridiculous lightning storm and a near-hurricane. i was accepted into the Masters programme, i had a dinner Skype with my family while my brother and uncles visited home, and i did more work than i've ever done in my life before. all of it paid off when i finally got everything back from various printing places, compiled it all and handed in my portfolio. i curled up that evening and got more sleep than i had probably gotten over the course of the rest of the month combined. the final week of November was spent with Chris, packing up all of his stuff and making some memories (last Wimpy date, last Cafe D'Vine date, last Pick n Pay run, all the sentimental stuff). we were invited over to the most incredible meal at the house of Lucinda; Lu started CrossFit with us in April and quickly solidified herself as an incredibly special friend and a core part of my CrossFit Grahamstown family (also deserving mention here are Chris, Kelvin, Derick and Gemma, all of whom were the most fantastic coaches, and Bruce and James, my favourite CrossFit couple ;) ). She gave me multiple lifts out to the box over the course of the year and is so encouraging and beautiful and inspirational! anyway, our farewell meal at her house, where we were joined by the usual culprits (here's looking at you, Kel, Bruce and James ;) ), was scrumptious and another blessing. On the 28th, i watched Chris drive off and then ran around packing up the last of my stuff before hopping on my own bus to the airport and then flying home.

DECEMBER

i had an Eshowe December! what that means is lots of time at my mom's school, lots of time at Tally's, Made @ Home and home-cooked meals. early in December, Sindi, Sindi's friend Mary and i drove down to Salt Rock to see Dear Reader perform live, which was easily the best musical performance i attended all year. (i'm not including Relient K, since i technically wasn't in attendance ;) ) i also got tons of pairs of new shoes! we finally received a package my gramma sent months ago and i got a pair of M&Ms covered pajama pants which are the business. otherwise, we had a very uneventful, peaceful, wonderful Christmas; we played way too much Bananagrams and i started doodling again. a minute before midnight on New Year's Eve, Chris phoned me - and that's how i rang in the new year.

2014, you were so good to me! i learned and grew and loved and ached so much this past year, and i can only hope that 2015 will be just as fulfilling and splendid. what were your highlights from last year? :)

currently - January edition

hi and welcome to my first "currently" post here at Save Me From My Selfie :D (side note: i've been trying to think of an acronym for my blog title - if anyone has any ideas, drop me a line, would ya? so far i have SMFMS, which i pronounce "simmmfimmms". super catchy. i'm definitely going places.)

i've always loved "currently" posts on blogs that i've read over the years - they're a fun way to find out what other people around the world are doing with their time and are generally not a very strenuous, heavy, social-commentary-esque thing to read, which is occasionally necessary. they're essentially fluffy, and that's not always a bad thing. i decided i'd start doing "currently" posts on this here blog for a few reasons, the main ones being they're a "staple" blog post and should thus force me to blog at least once a month (cue laughter to the point of tears). they're also a great way to look back on the months that have passed - a quick snippet of what you were doing a few months before - like a journal, only faster. (she explains at length in a long-winded paragraph)

so, without further ado, here's my "currently" for the start of this month, with some brief (hahaha) explanations of each thing beneath the photo:

READING: The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro

i love Kazuo Ishiguro's novels; Never Let Me Go is one of my favourite books of all time, and i subsequently read When We Were Orphans, which was another really incredible read. i bought a copy of The Remains of the Day last year but haven't had a chance to get to it until now, so my aim is to use the last few weeks of my freedom to give it my attention. it's slow to get into but i think i'm starting to reach the meat of the story and i'm enjoying it quite a bit :) (i have a STACK of novels i meant to get through, so you might hear about a few more of them this month. here's hoping!)

LISTENING TO: Ben Howard's "I Forget Where We Were" and Taylor Swift's "1989"

it's not really accurate to say that i'm listening to "I Forget Where We Were" in its entirety, since i haven't bought it yet, but what i HAVE heard from it is brilliant - i could listen to "The End of the Affair" over and over and over again. as for "1989", not a day goes by without me listening to at least one song off of the thing. it was one of my Christmas presents (inadvertently, after my mom got me an iTunes voucher) and, um, i'm obsessed. for some reference, it's playing now. (sorry, family!) soon, all of my conversation, consolation and advice will come from this album. you know, "shake it off!" and "baby, i could build a castle out of all the bricks they threw at me", and "when i was drowning - that's when i could finally breathe" and similarly nonsensical statements.

Swifty forever. also, after listening to this album multiple times (over 100, i'd guess), i reckon Harry Styles is a terrible driver and i would recommend you never get in a car with him. personal opinion. moving on.

WATCHING: Chuck (season 4), House of Cards (Season 1) and Black Books (Season 2)
i've missed Chuck so much! after watching the first three seasons as a family, we bought the fourth one and watched most of it a couple years ago - but we didn't manage to finish the season before i had to go back to varsity, and I NEVER CAUGHT UP. i finally pulled out the DVD box and am forcing everyone else in my family to watch episodes over so that i'm all caught up (sorry, family!) before we watch the fifth (!) and final (!) season.
i also have the first season of House of Cards (yes, i'm aware that i'm WAAAAY behind) and it's intriguing and very addictive.
to counterbalance all that hectic thinking and conniving, i'm watching Black Books which is, you know, Dylan Moran at his finest. he even provided me with the finest piece of summer poetry i may have ever heard:
"Think of a bee.
You are its knees.
You waft through me like a summer breeze.
Can I come round on Tuesday please?"
done.

ANTICIPATING: my trip to Johannesburg in a week (!) and graduation
yeah, in a week i'll be with Chris, in Johannesburg, and it will be GREAT. i am kind of excited :D
in other news, all my graduation info came in the post yesterday and it's all VERY exciting. i booked double the number of seats than i'm technically allowed, but i don't care. yaaaay!

ENJOYING: the sun, fruit, goals and Bananagrams

summer is the BEST. we are quite literally lying around in pools of our own sweat but i love it! it also means that there is a delightful range of delicious fruit on offer, and we've been eating ALL of it. grapes! plums! nectarines! mangos! spanspek! honeydew! watermelon! 

i'm also quite enjoying having goals and getting stuff done. doodling every day is so much fun! other things like exercise are less exciting, but quite gratifying ;)
finally: Bananagrams. best. game. ever. Mom, Sindi and i have been binge-playing. so fun.

MISSING: Chris, Andrea and Kymmie

these are pretty self-explanatory, but i miss Chris because i've gotten used to seeing his face all the time and we've been apart for over a month now, which has been below average. way below average. this week needs to pass by quickly, please!

i'm missing ALL of my American family desperately, but i am particularly missing my cousin Andrea and my aunt Kymmie. ANDREA: because, um, she is beautiful (i'm not superficial, i promise!) and this time last year we were having sleep overs at her house and dressing up in 80s get-up and driving around Sacramento singing along to Justin Timberlake and talking about the book collections we'd have on a desert island and eating ice cream and watching movies and running errands and babysitting and it was just fantastic. thus we can deduce that now, because we are NOT doing said things, it is just NOT fantastic. i'm really so smart. KYMMIE: since i've been doing artistic stuff, i've been especially missing this gorgeous and creative individual. oh, to be crafting and cooking and singing and dancing at her home! oh, to be hugging her! sigh.

CRAVING: a giant, blank notebook and my Adobe designing programmes

all of this doodling has me scrambling for places to PUT it. i have these tiny Moleskines with me in which i've been compiling most of my scribbles, but i stupidly went and left my LARGE Moleskines in Grahamstown... hence the illustrations for this post being done on the back of my (green) Graduation Information booklet. 

i'm also desperate to get back into Illustrator, InDesign and Photoshop and get digitally designing again, but a month is not long to wait! who knows - maybe the February "currently" will be digital ;)

CONSUMING: copious amounts of black coffee and double cream yoghurt

...because these are the best things to consume. end of story.

WEARING: summer dresses

another reason to love the heat: i can wear all of my summer dresses! :D wanna see the dress i'm wearing today? (YES. YES, YOU DO.) selfie time! i will give you two versions; ready?

THE DREAM VERSION

oh, lovely! so summery and flowery and flattering.

THE REALITY VERSION

i bought this at a thrift store in California this time last year. it is (clearly) three times too big for me. on the plus side, it breathes really well...

;)

what are y'all currently up to? :D

you'll be my resolution

it's after 8PM on New Year's Day... and here we are.

i've been a blogger for over ten years now, so it feels unbelievably weird to be writing an introductory post, but here goes! my name is Hannah; i'm a grammar snoot and a Bachelor of Journalism graduate about to start both my Master of Arts and a graphic design internship. i'm sorta crazy about the four Cs: cats, coffee, CrossFit and my boyfriend Chris :)

i used to blog over at Pink Chucks but for the past year it hasn't really felt like home, so i've finally taken the plunge (on New Year's Day, because when better?) and started a new blog - a place where i can talk your ears off about music, design, photos, and my life as a whole. prepare yourselves for a whole lot of irony and puns... and, um, some selfies.

...case in point. for now, though, i'll leave you to it with some great music:

Matt Corby - Resolution

Ben Howard - I Forget Where We Were

NEEDTOBREATHE - Wasteland

Bear's Den - Above The Clouds Of Pompeii

Brooke Fraser - Kings & Queens

Louisa Wendorff - Blank Space//Style mash-up (Taylor Swift cover)

Vance Joy - Mess Is Mine

Happy New Year, and stay tuned!